


He Remembers

by Error404willtolivenotfound



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Angst, Cancer, Fluff, M/M, Marriage, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, Suicide Attempts, repetitive, two boys in love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-20
Updated: 2019-02-20
Packaged: 2019-11-01 05:44:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17861441
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Error404willtolivenotfound/pseuds/Error404willtolivenotfound
Summary: Josh remembers what life with Tyler was like before the cancer took him





	He Remembers

Josh couldn’t quite remember what his reaction had been when he’d found him holding the blade against his wrist. He thinks he might have screamed his name, told him to stop. He did remember holding the boy for hours after though, helping him through his thoughts and his tears. They were sixteen then. Only young.

Josh remembers when the boy tried for the first time. He remembers running through hospital corridors to find him. The sounds of his machines, beeping, as the boy laid unconscious on the bed. He remembers how his throat hurt for weeks after from screaming from the nightmares. They were only twenty then. So young still.

Josh remembers all the multiple fights about the boy not eating enough, not sleeping enough. He remembers the multiple hospital visits because he wasn’t eating enough. Josh remembers crying in the middle of the night as the boy started to fall again. He remembers hiding his pain from the boy. He remembers finding the boy bleeding in the shower. They were twenty five then.

Josh remembers holding the boys hand as tears stained his cheeks. He remembers telling the boy how much he loved as he laid almost still on the bed again. He remembers kissing the boys hand over and over, trying to wake him. He remembers visiting the boy everyday while he was in his comatose state. He remembers when the boy woke up and cried. They were twenty seven then.

He remembers the boys name. Tyler. He remembers holding Tyler at night, he remembers making Tyler breakfast in the morning. He remembers Tyler’s smile, the tears in his eyes, when he proposed. He remembers how amazing Tyler had looked at the wedding. He remembers how much he loved Tyler, with all his flaws and perfections.

That was forty nine years ago. Now the bed seems too cold, too big, without Tyler in it. The house seems empty without Tyler living with him. Music feels pointless without Tyler. Josh lived with Tyler his entire life. Now he just exists without Tyler. He curses the cancer that took the man he loved so much away from him. He hates the loneliness of life. He just wants to be with Tyler again.

“I love you, Tyler Joseph. Now and forever.”


End file.
